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This is an archived posting from my previous website “Chips Antidotal Wanderings” – a personal blog about family, creative moments, and pain management activities in my life. That blog was active from 2004-2011.

Ouch!

Last week was difficult to say the least. As some of you know I have migraine disease and experience debilitating headaches almost daily. For the most part I have accustomed myself to the grind this takes on my body and soul. But there are times when it really gets the best of me and drags me down. Last week seemed to be one of those times.

Creating journal pages to express my inner thoughts is a practice that works well for me in two directions.  One – it simply lets me be me and experiment with creative toys in an expressive way and Two – it gives me an opportunity to get into the “zen flow” and escape from the pain or at least minimize it for a while.

Creatively Speaking

I did manage to do a little bit of creative expression in the art studio recently. I made a new accordion style envelope book with individual pockets for each loose-leaf expression page. I figured this little piece of art will encourage me to stay involved with creating my pain relief therapy project pages.  Maybe more so than the spiral bound flip book I’m currently using.

I also made a “personal” collage after reading and becoming involved in a fellow AW participants blog site. The Mixed Media Memoirs blog offers weekly challenges or suggestions for journal subjects and putting them into creative art form in coordination with ones writings. This weeks subject was “This is Me.” I accomplished my collage on a day when I wasn’t feeling particularly artful.

I decided to create without expectations. It’s not outside my comfort zone to build an art piece when I’m not feeling good. However, to do so often ends in a display I do not like at first. But many times I find I do like the piece later.  I simply have to let it grow on me sometimes.

Although at this point I don’t find this page in my art journal particularly pleasing to look at, it does actually represent parts of me and the mood I was in at the time I created it. Some of the images and shapes I added to represent me included a blue jean ink backdrop with splashes of pink, and white lace to show the fabrics I like to wear the most and a simple house to represent the small town prairie lifestyle I’ve adapted to over the years.

There are three nuggets of slightly different textures to show the evolving parts of my personal world too. A gold leafed lizard, plants, and butterfly shows other sides of me and an image of a delicate woman as well. Throughout the page I have doodled words that describe characteristics of my personality such as, confident, resourceful, unpredictable, adventurous, ever-changing, content, quiet, peaceful, artistic, etc. A few more words were added to indicate where I was in my mind at the time I was working on the project. They include “Forty Four,” “At Peace,” “Lucky”, “In the Moment,” “The Best at Being Me,” “At Home,” “In Love,” and “Challenged.”

Even though I described myself well, the collage itself just doesn’t appeal to my senses just yet. The color blends are awful, the style is too messy. But then again, at times so is my life. So I guess even that part of the collage speaks well of me.

I know that for me creating without judgement is best.  It’s the process that works it’s magic on me.  Nevertheless, sometimes I find the critic inside me wants to voice it’s opinion.  Such is the case for this journal page.

On this piece I allowed myself to be a child artist. The important thing is that I did complete the challenge I accepted. Which is what I set out to do at the start of the project. 🙂 So yeah me anyway!

Remember, you don’t have to be an artist to enjoy the joy of creating art!

~Cindy

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